Post by The Chupster on Oct 3, 2008 0:47:49 GMT -5
Warning: If you ain't read "Chupa's OCW Pig Roast Part 1," ya might wanna.
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The day after Overdrive, everyone is in a nice little picnic area off to the side of the parking lot outside the arena, chewing on their respective cooked piglets. Most everyone seems to be having a good time, as enemies and friends alike come together in the spirit of brotherhood, some fresh off of kicking ass, some fresh off of an asskicking, but all smiling and gnawing on the delicious flame-cooked meat.
The Chupster makes his way up to the head of the table and thumps lightly on the aged wood with ol' Bessy, smashing only a small part into toothpicks. He raises his beer regally.
Chups:[/b][/color] Everyone, I wanna thank ya fer comin' ta my lil piggy roast here, which I threw as a way ta celebrate OCW's return ta action.
Everyone cheers. Yes, even the moodier, morose fellas; everyone is in good spirits, as only alcohol and red meat can provide.
Chups:[/b] [/color] I wanna congratulate all'a the winners last night, an' I wanna give mad props to the folks what went out there an' got whoopified. There was some close calls, an' there was some ass-rapin', an' overall I think we got together an' had a nice, fun, violent time. Mad props ta Scythe fer unifyin' a couple'a straps- hey, chew with yer mouth closed, ya pasty-ass goon- an' I still dunno how I beat Pain, cuz I went in there sore as a mofo.
The Rage: We were off for over a month, man. How could you be sore?
Chups: I was preparin' this here repast- lemme tell ya, these lil piggies don't raise themselves, an' I was usin' the Chupacabra time-honored family recipe, passed down from mah great-great-great-great-great Unca Grandpappy. It's some time-consumin' an' labor-intensive shit f'real.
Hulk: Piggies GOOOOOOOOOOOD.
Chups: Thank ya, I like 'em too.
Zero: What're these crispy blackened bits?
Chups: Well, uh, I had the idea 'a dressin' up each lil piggy in a costume like the fella or fellaette that I was cookin' it for, but I put the costumes on 'fore I cooked 'em 'stead'a after. So that'd be some burnt fabric or some shit. Sorry 'bout that.
Angel: Good stuff, can I get the recipe?
Chups: Sure, just lemme get ta the end o' my speech here. Like I said, I cooked up this lil shindig so's we could relax 'fore we hafta get back onna road and start eatin' like crap again an' all'a that jazz. We're all in this together an' I appreciate the hell outta each one'a ya. A toast to the O-C-W.
Everyone in attendance raises their plastic glass/can/bottle into the air.
Chups:[/b][/color] Each'a these here piggies was prepared with love, an' I hope y'all enjoy 'em an' take 'em home with ya ta enjoy fer as long as the meat's good.
Osiris: Love... wow, you're getting sort of sentimental there, Chupa.
Chups: Nah, I ain't speakin' metaphorically, I mean it literal.
Everyone slowly stops chewing.
Krimzon:[/b][/color] You... you mean, like the sauce, it's like, "love sauce," right?
Chups: Well, yeah. That's why I'm so sore. I made sweet sweet love ta each o' these lil piglets 'fore'n I trucked 'em out here. The juice makes the meat more tender.
The Rage (mouth full of half-chewed meat): Dude. Tell me you did NOT fuck this pig.
Chups: Nah, I didn't fuck that'n.
Sean 'whews' and wipes the panic sweat from his brow.
Chups:[/b][/color] Jus' joshin', I wouldn't do that to ya! Yeah, I fucked that'n EXTRA hard, jus' fer you, bro!
Pig parts fly everywhere as pork is spit, spewed, horked and hurled. The Chupster shrugs, confused. The Hulk chews on.
Hulk:[/b][/color] Porked pork GOOOOOOOOOOD.
Chups: What th' hell?
Osiris: I'm gonna KILL you!
Osiris's sentiment is echoed by everyone but the Hulk. Noting the death-looks in about 25+ pairs of eyes, Chupa starts to back towards the nearby parking lot.
Chups:[/b][/color] Look, I didn't mean nuttin' by it, I mean, I'm bloody an' raw down there from all'a that piggy sexin'.
Trish: There was BLOOD in it TOO???
Trish goes down to her knees, barfing up everything she's ate in the last week. The mob, sloppy and queasy, collectively make it to their feet and begin pursuit.
Chups (running like crazy):[/b][/color] Would it help if I apologized???
The Chupster makes it to his motorcycle, hops on and kickstarts it in one smooth motion. Moments later, a mob of heaving, puke-covered OCW wrestlers is watching from the nastified parking lot as the Chupster motors down the road...[/color]
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The day after Overdrive, everyone is in a nice little picnic area off to the side of the parking lot outside the arena, chewing on their respective cooked piglets. Most everyone seems to be having a good time, as enemies and friends alike come together in the spirit of brotherhood, some fresh off of kicking ass, some fresh off of an asskicking, but all smiling and gnawing on the delicious flame-cooked meat.
The Chupster makes his way up to the head of the table and thumps lightly on the aged wood with ol' Bessy, smashing only a small part into toothpicks. He raises his beer regally.
Chups:[/b][/color] Everyone, I wanna thank ya fer comin' ta my lil piggy roast here, which I threw as a way ta celebrate OCW's return ta action.
Everyone cheers. Yes, even the moodier, morose fellas; everyone is in good spirits, as only alcohol and red meat can provide.
Chups:[/b] [/color] I wanna congratulate all'a the winners last night, an' I wanna give mad props to the folks what went out there an' got whoopified. There was some close calls, an' there was some ass-rapin', an' overall I think we got together an' had a nice, fun, violent time. Mad props ta Scythe fer unifyin' a couple'a straps- hey, chew with yer mouth closed, ya pasty-ass goon- an' I still dunno how I beat Pain, cuz I went in there sore as a mofo.
The Rage: We were off for over a month, man. How could you be sore?
Chups: I was preparin' this here repast- lemme tell ya, these lil piggies don't raise themselves, an' I was usin' the Chupacabra time-honored family recipe, passed down from mah great-great-great-great-great Unca Grandpappy. It's some time-consumin' an' labor-intensive shit f'real.
Hulk: Piggies GOOOOOOOOOOOD.
Chups: Thank ya, I like 'em too.
Zero: What're these crispy blackened bits?
Chups: Well, uh, I had the idea 'a dressin' up each lil piggy in a costume like the fella or fellaette that I was cookin' it for, but I put the costumes on 'fore I cooked 'em 'stead'a after. So that'd be some burnt fabric or some shit. Sorry 'bout that.
Angel: Good stuff, can I get the recipe?
Chups: Sure, just lemme get ta the end o' my speech here. Like I said, I cooked up this lil shindig so's we could relax 'fore we hafta get back onna road and start eatin' like crap again an' all'a that jazz. We're all in this together an' I appreciate the hell outta each one'a ya. A toast to the O-C-W.
Everyone in attendance raises their plastic glass/can/bottle into the air.
Chups:[/b][/color] Each'a these here piggies was prepared with love, an' I hope y'all enjoy 'em an' take 'em home with ya ta enjoy fer as long as the meat's good.
Osiris: Love... wow, you're getting sort of sentimental there, Chupa.
Chups: Nah, I ain't speakin' metaphorically, I mean it literal.
Everyone slowly stops chewing.
Krimzon:[/b][/color] You... you mean, like the sauce, it's like, "love sauce," right?
Chups: Well, yeah. That's why I'm so sore. I made sweet sweet love ta each o' these lil piglets 'fore'n I trucked 'em out here. The juice makes the meat more tender.
The Rage (mouth full of half-chewed meat): Dude. Tell me you did NOT fuck this pig.
Chups: Nah, I didn't fuck that'n.
Sean 'whews' and wipes the panic sweat from his brow.
Chups:[/b][/color] Jus' joshin', I wouldn't do that to ya! Yeah, I fucked that'n EXTRA hard, jus' fer you, bro!
Pig parts fly everywhere as pork is spit, spewed, horked and hurled. The Chupster shrugs, confused. The Hulk chews on.
Hulk:[/b][/color] Porked pork GOOOOOOOOOOD.
Chups: What th' hell?
Osiris: I'm gonna KILL you!
Osiris's sentiment is echoed by everyone but the Hulk. Noting the death-looks in about 25+ pairs of eyes, Chupa starts to back towards the nearby parking lot.
Chups:[/b][/color] Look, I didn't mean nuttin' by it, I mean, I'm bloody an' raw down there from all'a that piggy sexin'.
Trish: There was BLOOD in it TOO???
Trish goes down to her knees, barfing up everything she's ate in the last week. The mob, sloppy and queasy, collectively make it to their feet and begin pursuit.
Chups (running like crazy):[/b][/color] Would it help if I apologized???
The Chupster makes it to his motorcycle, hops on and kickstarts it in one smooth motion. Moments later, a mob of heaving, puke-covered OCW wrestlers is watching from the nastified parking lot as the Chupster motors down the road...[/color]
