Who flung poo? (many mentioned)

[WHIP]

A shot of the OCW dressing room comes into view. The camera focuses to reveal Teabag unwrapping the tape from his hands & wrists. The camera is shaking just ever so slightly. Teabag looks up with a somewhat annoyed expression.

Teabag: "What is your problem?"

Cameraman: "Its just totally creeping me out!"

The camera pans right to reveal the Smiling Monkey Ref squatting on the cold tile floor. Monkey is holding a spent banana peel. The monkey looks at the cameraman, its empty black eyes expressionless. Then a smile comes across its face as it shoves a finger into its nostril.

Teabag: "Hey tool! Can you do your job here or not?"

The camera jolts left, back to Bagger.

Cameraman: "Yes sir...but its staring at me."

Teabag: "Geez man! I thought you were a professional! You've been to the zoo haven't you? You've seen these things on National Geographic or The Discovery Channel, right? So pull up your lace panties & act like a man! I'm starting to lose my patience with you!"

Cameraman: "How did you know I was wearing panties?"

Teabag shakes his head in frustration: "Because you pulled them up too high & you can see them when you hold up the camera...moron." The camera shakes for a moment. "Stop trying to cover up yourself! The damage has already been done...freak."

Cameraman: "Uhhh...why did you request the camera?"

Teabag: "Nice segway toolboy. Did they teach you that in vocational school? The reason I requested the camera was to re-introduce myself to the OCW faithful. To remind those fans who may have forgotten who I am. To put an end to the rumors that I was finished in this business. My name is Teabag! I am The Megastar! I have come back for one reason...I love the OCW.
No other federation can hold a candle to us. We are the birthplace of insanity, chaos, and originality. In these halls only one thing can hold you back, yourself. If you have the determination & courage, you can achieve greatness. Once again I find myself in this sweaty locker-room, looking at familiar faces. Some I don't care for as much as others. But all have my respect as my OCW brothers. Its good to be back!
Tonight I faced the man responsible for putting me out a couple years ago...The Chupacabra. After he embarrassed me last time we met, I considered quitting wrestling. I almost walked away from the business I love. But legends don't die, they regroup. I took some time to re-evaluate my life & plan for the next step. I spent over a year in Thailand kicking & punching bamboo trees to harden my body. Through meditation & discipline, I honed my body to become the pinnacle of fitness. I was almost finished with my training when I got a call from Chupa. He said something new & unique was about to happen. He said the OCW was about to be reborn. I asked if I could help out. He accepted & here I am."

Suddenly a thud is heard & the camera shakes.

Cameraman: "Oh my God what was that? Something hit me in the head!" The camera shakes for a moment before a hand appears from the right. The hand is covered with what looks like chocolate pudding. A long sniff is heard.

Cameraman: "That damn monkey hit me in the head with crap!!! What the hell!?! I'm going to kill him!"

Teabag: "The heck you are! If you hurt Chum Chum you answer to me!"

Cameraman: "Chum Chum...you call the monkey Chum Chum? What is he, your friend?"

Teabag: "Sure...not sure about what his name really is, but he makes me laugh. Besides he can throw poo like nobody. I'm even considering getting him some braces to fix that crooked smile."

Cameraman: "Well if he throws crap at me again I'm leaving!"

Teabag: "Whatever dude, like you're an asset around here. Just remember one call to the Temp Agency that sent you here & you're history. Now before you interrupted me I was talking about my return...Overall I would say it was a success. I KO'd The Chupacabra in 90 seconds, pinned Alexander Sin, eliminated Werwulf, watched Kunk brain himself, and nailed Manticore with a Sweaty Sac Attack (leaping plancha) before taking his right middle finger as a trophy! Plus I became the #1 contender for the XV Title! Not too shabby at all, wouldn't you agree Chum Chum?"

Monkey Referee: "Epp Epp!"

The monkey locks eyes with the camera lens. Time seems to stand still as the camera zooms in on those dark emotionless eyes. The crooked smile returns to Monkeys face. Suddenly the Monkey leaps at the camera & knocks the cameraman to the floor. Screams are heard but nothing is seen, the camera only shows the bottom of the lockers.

Cameraman: "Get him off me!!!!! Help! He's humping the side of my head!!!! Please Help me!!"

Teabag: "Better to let him finish what he's started. I saw this once on Animal Planet. If you push him away he will bite you!"

Cameraman: "HELP ME!!!!!!!"

Teabag: "No problem." Footsteps are heard as Teabag runs away. The camera starts to fade to black.

Teabag:" Anybody got a towel? A really big one?!?!?!"

Fade to black.

[Shandy]

Teabag runs down the hall still in search of a towel but it seems nobody is around anymore. The backstage area seems empty and there is an awkward silence around.
He turns a corner and suddenly comes to face a dead end where he was sure there was none before. At the far off wall there is a small table with an envelope on it.
Teabag walks closer and looks at the envelope and the bright red letters saying "Teabag" on it. He looks around and over his shoulder checking for a trap but nothing happens.
Teabag then takes the envelope from the table and opens it. He takes out the note inside starting to read it before he throws it away with a puzzled and angry look on his face. He then gets his mind back working remembering that he wanted to get a towel for the cameraman.
Teabag spins around running off down the hall again as the camera zooms in on the note revealing it:



The camera then fades to black again.[/colour]

[KAVEEKS]

oooo... (yoda voice) intrigued am I