Post by WHIP on Apr 1, 2010 22:22:46 GMT -5
“Step Up!” by Drowning Pool blasts from the loud speakers as the crowd stands on their feet. The arena lights dim as a silhouette emerges onstage. A single spotlight shines down on the OCW World Championship, resting on one man’s shoulder. The light bounces off it to reveal the face of the new OCW World Heavyweight Champion…TEABAG! The crowd starts chanting his name as he raises the microphone high above. The Champ pauses for a moment to enjoy this moment. The X-Violence Title is secured around his waist. The arena lights come back on as the champ draws in a huge breath.
Teabag: “Behold the dawning of a new era! The Era of Mega-Violence! Since my return I have laid waste to all who stood in my way. I have blown up, cut up, messed up, or knocked out every single person I’ve faced! “The crowd cheers. “Do I feel sorry for my actions? Should I be repentant for what I’ve done to others? Absolutely not! Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, always be the first to strike! Never stand around waiting for something to happen. Back when I used to be a member of The Establishment I got used to the finer things in life. Even though I was the OCW World Champion, I took things for granted. Just when I thought I had it made, they turned on me & literally gave the boot. The worst thing was I never saw it coming.
So let’s fast forward a few years to 2K10. Once again I stand as the World Heavyweight Champion, and I’m also the X-Violence Champion. “Teabag holds the World Title high above as the crowd cheers. “But I’m not resting on past accomplishments. I’ve already chosen my next course of action. I have decided to offer a KO Shootfight rematch to Manticore, as long as Ric Slade agrees. Manticore, you have impressed me more than anyone else. You haven’t backed down from a fight & have taken me to my limit! For that Mr.Core…you have earned my respect! I would almost go as far to say that you are a true warrior, given the way you have carried yourself in the ring. Even in our Backwoods AssKickin’ Deadman’s Challenge, you never gave up and kept fighting. We have traded blood as well as fists, and I consider you a worthy opponent. I don’t have to tell you how the internet chat rooms are buzzing about our last match, some have even called it the early favorite for Match of the Year! So long as Ric Slade agrees, let’s have ourselves one more match!”
The crowd cheers in approval.
Teabag: “With the first order of business taken care of. Let me turn my attention to the pathetic Gonadslapper I mean Goatsucker.” Teabag glares directly into the camera. “You must have some kind of Death Wish!! You’re actually looking forward to facing me?!? You’re on a collision course with the man responsible for raising OCWs’ Health Insurance premium 15% in one month. Just look at this little clip if you somehow feel optimistic about your odds of winning, if you have little kids in the audience now would be a good time to turn away. “A clip of Manticores’ head getting carved up by Teabags’ knife is shown. Next is the clip of Manticore getting his junk stomped, complete with the slo-mo of the following blood splatter. “Chupa I always knew your mental state was off, but just what kind of retarded fat leprechaun are you? You get a couple wins under your belt & you think you can hang with me? Well since the entire world considers you to be brain-dead, when we meet I plan to finish the job!
While I’m on a roll, I have one last person to mention by name...Chris Wallace! I’m glad to see you’re back, even though you tossed me out of the ring & I lost out on $5000. There aren’t any hard feelings because I was about to do the same thing to you. Now I don’t know who your dark-haired beauty is…” Teabag winks at the camera. “But you might want to keep a sharp eye on her. Cause I hear she was in my locker room last week & I can’t be held responsible for retarded leprechauns. But otherwise man, it’s good to see you back.
Now with all that said, let me address everyone in the back. If you think you’ve got what it takes to take what I’ve got, then step up! But be warned, I’m not playing favorites or pulling any punches. I have raised the level of violence in this business! Let me say this while the limelight is mine.” Bagger once again looks into the camera. “Pain is temporary, but glory is forever!!”
With his point made the OCW World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the parking lot & drives away. Fade to a commercial for OCW’s Backwoods AssKickin’ 2010 DVD.
Teabag: “Behold the dawning of a new era! The Era of Mega-Violence! Since my return I have laid waste to all who stood in my way. I have blown up, cut up, messed up, or knocked out every single person I’ve faced! “The crowd cheers. “Do I feel sorry for my actions? Should I be repentant for what I’ve done to others? Absolutely not! Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, always be the first to strike! Never stand around waiting for something to happen. Back when I used to be a member of The Establishment I got used to the finer things in life. Even though I was the OCW World Champion, I took things for granted. Just when I thought I had it made, they turned on me & literally gave the boot. The worst thing was I never saw it coming.
So let’s fast forward a few years to 2K10. Once again I stand as the World Heavyweight Champion, and I’m also the X-Violence Champion. “Teabag holds the World Title high above as the crowd cheers. “But I’m not resting on past accomplishments. I’ve already chosen my next course of action. I have decided to offer a KO Shootfight rematch to Manticore, as long as Ric Slade agrees. Manticore, you have impressed me more than anyone else. You haven’t backed down from a fight & have taken me to my limit! For that Mr.Core…you have earned my respect! I would almost go as far to say that you are a true warrior, given the way you have carried yourself in the ring. Even in our Backwoods AssKickin’ Deadman’s Challenge, you never gave up and kept fighting. We have traded blood as well as fists, and I consider you a worthy opponent. I don’t have to tell you how the internet chat rooms are buzzing about our last match, some have even called it the early favorite for Match of the Year! So long as Ric Slade agrees, let’s have ourselves one more match!”
The crowd cheers in approval.
Teabag: “With the first order of business taken care of. Let me turn my attention to the pathetic Gonadslapper I mean Goatsucker.” Teabag glares directly into the camera. “You must have some kind of Death Wish!! You’re actually looking forward to facing me?!? You’re on a collision course with the man responsible for raising OCWs’ Health Insurance premium 15% in one month. Just look at this little clip if you somehow feel optimistic about your odds of winning, if you have little kids in the audience now would be a good time to turn away. “A clip of Manticores’ head getting carved up by Teabags’ knife is shown. Next is the clip of Manticore getting his junk stomped, complete with the slo-mo of the following blood splatter. “Chupa I always knew your mental state was off, but just what kind of retarded fat leprechaun are you? You get a couple wins under your belt & you think you can hang with me? Well since the entire world considers you to be brain-dead, when we meet I plan to finish the job!
While I’m on a roll, I have one last person to mention by name...Chris Wallace! I’m glad to see you’re back, even though you tossed me out of the ring & I lost out on $5000. There aren’t any hard feelings because I was about to do the same thing to you. Now I don’t know who your dark-haired beauty is…” Teabag winks at the camera. “But you might want to keep a sharp eye on her. Cause I hear she was in my locker room last week & I can’t be held responsible for retarded leprechauns. But otherwise man, it’s good to see you back.
Now with all that said, let me address everyone in the back. If you think you’ve got what it takes to take what I’ve got, then step up! But be warned, I’m not playing favorites or pulling any punches. I have raised the level of violence in this business! Let me say this while the limelight is mine.” Bagger once again looks into the camera. “Pain is temporary, but glory is forever!!”
With his point made the OCW World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the parking lot & drives away. Fade to a commercial for OCW’s Backwoods AssKickin’ 2010 DVD.